That Brother's My Father

''That Brother's My Father''
Season 3, Episode 4
Production Code: TBA
Written by TBA
Directed by TBA
First Aired: October 7, 2014
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That Brother's My Father is the fourth episode of season 3 of Brickleberry.

Synopsis

Woody's mom, Anita Johnson, is revealed to have actually been alive all this time and comes into town for a surprise visit.

Plot

They're such idiots!

During a Civil War reenactment, Woody gets a call from Malloy telling him that his mother is coming over to visit, much to Woody's shock. Back at the park, Woody tells Malloy that his mother was a "fucking nightmare", having locked him in a closet full of birds and bees after she caught him masturbating as a kid. Woody's mother, Anita then arrives, saying that she's moving in after getting kicked out of the nursing home. Malloy is happy to have Anita around, now that he has a grandmother to spoil him.

Later, Denzel meets Anita for the first time and instantly falls in love. Woody tries to warn Anita to steer clear of Denzel, but it's too late when he finds that they're having sex, and even worse, they're married. Woody first can't stand being Denzel's son due to how he treats him. Anita then suggests that the two go spend the day together, and Woody and Denzel begin to bond together, and decide to attend a father-son picnic.

When Woody comes home past curfew, Anita locks him in a closet with birds and bees again. Afterwards, Denzel convinces Woody to stand up for himself. But when Woody tries to, Anita blames Denzel for being a bad influence on her son and they get into a fight, and eventually divorce.

The next day, Anita begins to talk badly about Denzel. At this point, Woody is pissed and finally stands up to his mother's abuse, telling her that her husband left because of how horrible a person she is, and promptly throws her out. Malloy deserts Anita as well upon realizing that she's broke. At the father-son picnic, Woody is sad that he no longer has a father, until Denzel arrives to spend the day with him.

Meanwhile, Connie is excited that Wheel of Fortune auditions are being held in town, meaning that she gets to meet her idol, Pat Sajak. Connie passes the audition, but everything comes crashing down when upon seeing Pat, she ends up shitting all over the place and is disqualified. Later, Connie kidnaps Pat and takes him back to her cabin, and shows him a homemade Wheel set in her basement. Steve and Ethel become suspicious of Connie's behavior, and are shocked when they find out the truth. Taking advice from game show "host-age" negotiator Buzz Buzzer, Steve and Ethel pretend to be contestants and let Connie win so they can save Pat. Unfortunately, Steve unintentionally ends up winning, causing Connie to go berserk. Eventually enough, Steve and Ethel question why they're even bothering protecting Pat Sajak, and hand him over to Connie. Fearing for his life, Pat promises to do anything for Connie, and makes her co-host of Wheel.

Quotes

Jorge: Can I buy him?

[Denzel is shown dressed as a slave]

Denzel: This is some bullshit.

---

Woody: LICK MY MUSKET BALLS, YANKEE!

---

Abraham Lincoln Impersonator: Fourscore and seven-

[The Abraham Lincoln Impersonator gets shot dead by Bobby, BoDean, and Firecracker Jim and they all cheer]

BoDean: We just won The Civil War!

Firecracker Jim: I told you The South would rise again!

Bobby: It's gunna be just like the good ol' days!

[Denzel shows up, looking angry]

Bobby: Awkwaaarrrrrd.

---

Malloy: If your mom's still alive, then who's ashes are in that urn?

Woody: Ex-girlfriend who gave me some lip?

---

[Anita locks Woody in a closet full of birds and bees]

Woody: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anita: This is what happens to boys who touch their dirty peckers.

---

Malloy: Someone is gunna pay for this!

Woody: The Jews?

---

[Woody wears a sweater that says "Don't Touch Your Dirty Pecker"]

Malloy: Well, that puts the "Christ" in "Christmas".

---

Anita: Woodrow, my dear.

Woody: Hi, Mommy.

Anita: Oh, what a lovely home you have here. [Anita notices that the houseplant is dusty] Uh-oh. Dusty. You forgot to dust our plant when you were little. That's why your father left.

Woody: I'm sorry mommy, I'm a bad boy! [pulls pants and underwear down] SPANK ME! SPANK ME!!!

Anita: Oh, don't be silly, Woodrow. We'll just call that strike one.

Woody: Oh. Okay. Malloy, forget you saw that!

Malloy: Oh, I wish I could.

---

Anita: [gasp] And you must be my cute little grand-cubby!

Malloy: I am, Gam-Gam!

Anita: Oh, I can't wait to spoil you to death. [gives Malloy 99% Cacao chocolate]

Malloy: See, Woody? Grandma's not a horrible cunt like you said.

---

Anita: I was thrown out of the nursing home. Apparently, when your roommate cheats at bingo, you're not allowed to cut her feeding tube.

---

Pat Sajack: Very impressive.

Connie: P-P-P-P ... Pat Sajack?

[Connie's stomach grumbles]

Connie: Uh-oh.

[Connie shits herself on a huge geyser of shit and spins around on the wheel of fortune]

Connie: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

---

[Anita shows Malloy, Steve, and Ethel Woody's photo album, much to Woody's embarassment]

Anita: And this is his first day of kindergarten.

[Anita shows a picture of Woody crying, drooling snot, and wetting his pants]

Malloy: Think we all know what bus he was riding.

---

Denzel: Call me Denzel.

Anita: Oh my. Well, aren't you just the sweetest young man. Anita Johnson.

Denzel: Good cuz you're about to get a big one.

Anita: You certainly come on strong.

Denzel: Oh I cum on a lot of things. Want me to show you?

---

[Connie and the guy show up in the shit-stained Wheel of Fortune building]

Connie: So, uh, what time should I be here for the taping?

Guy: Connie, the insurance adjuster is telling us the smartest thing to do would be to set fire to this building. Even the soil on which this building stands has been rendered barren for generations to come.

---

[Woody finds Denzel in bed with his mom]

Denzel: Sup Woody?

Woody: [grabs Denzel and SLAMS him against the wall] YOU SON OF A BITCH, I'LL KILL YOU!!!

Anita: Woody! Stop! That's no way to treat your father!

Woody: My FATHER!?

Denzel: Oh, you didn't hear? We got married. I'm yo daddy!

[Woody has a mini-stroke]

---

Malloy: White people. You know what I'm saying?

---

[Woody drinks with Denzel and then he notices a poster for a father-son picnic and he feels sad]

Denzel: Everything cool, Woody?

Woody: Yeah, it's just ... Well, they're having a father-son picnic this weekend and, ... it makes me sad.

Denzel: That they have to advertize these things in bars?

---

Woody: I should have dusted that fucking plant.

---

Jorge: I still want to buy your slave.

---

Connie: Oh, Pat. Have I got a surprise for you!?

Pat Sajack: Please don't tell me there's a front Pat.

---

[Woody finally snaps and throws his mother out of the house]

Woody: GET THE FUCK OUT!!!

[Malloy comes chasing after her]

Malloy: No! Gam-Gam, don't go! I ne-I need more presents-I-I-I mean, I-I love you.

Anita: I don't have any more money, Malloy.

Malloy: [leaves, flipping her off] Choke on my balls.

Trivia

• Woody's mom is revealed to still be alive while Woody has always stated that she was dead in Two Weeks Notice and Woody's Girl and he admitted he lied when saying his mom was dead in those episodes and also her first name is revealed to be Anita.
• This episode reveals that Woody enjoys masturbating to pictures of nude pregnant African women.
• This was the highest rated episode of Season 3, and Brickleberry's creators celebrated this.

  

  Best Picnic Ever!

• When finding out that Anita and Denzel are married, Woody has a "mini-stroke", which previously occurred in Woody's Girl.